Pastoral Care textbooks, eh?

"What you have to realise is that pastoral care is all about relationships. Some people evidently think it's about sitting alone in a room and not talking to people, but it's clearly not. Sometimes the most significant thing you can do is just be there. Don't try to fix anything, just be present. I've been a spiritual director at Widegate Christian Church in Whocaresville, South Carolina for ten years and I've spent the whole time just being there, doing nothing and not fixing anything. Now I've decided to write a book about it."

I get that there's value in being present with people in difficult times. I didn't need a 300 page book to explain that. But helping people "by just being there" implies that you're the sort of person gifted with the sort of presence that calms people down and makes them feel heard. I'm not really gifted that way. My "just being there" doesn't tend to make anyone feel better about anything. I tend to break things. If I could help people "just by being there" then anyone I ever hung out with would leave feeling great. There's obviously more to it that that. Why can't they put that in the book?

Make of that what you will.

Garry with 2 Rs