Hats Off To Broadway opens tonight at Charles Darwin University. It’s my first outing with the Darwin Chorale, and certainly my first foray into singing solo into a microphone without a valid excuse (church, comedy, and karaoke are all perfectly reasonable exceptions, obviously). Actually, in many respects, it’s just like standing up to do comedy for the first time, except instead of getting up in front of a room full of people and saying “look at me; I think I’m funny,” tonight I’m going to stand in front of hundreds of people who’ve actually paid money (at least comedy was free) and say “look at me; I think I can sing”.

There’s been some kind of horrible mistake, I’m sure. While on the balance of things, I can get away with claiming to be funny, as long as I’m not charging anyone for it, it remains a scientific fact that I can’t sing properly. I certainly don’t belong out the front singing ensembles from Lés Mis with a world renowned tenor on one side of me and a pretty, trained, talented and utterly terrifying soprano on the other. Either I’m about to wake up in a cold sweat, or I’m about to attempt the silliest performance yet in a career that includes impersonating a lustful photocopier. I guess we’re about to find out.

Tomorrow we’ll discover what out God in Heaven has in store…

Garry with 2 Rs

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