So the question is… what the blazes does any of this have to do with being unemployed and cancelling job interviews?

Well… the day after I lost my job I went a bit mental and decided that, come hell or high water, I needed to find myself a job, any job, by the end of the day. It wasn’t the most realistic of expectations to set myself, but that’s what happens when you go a bit mental. I didn’t find Hell, or any high water to speak of, and the only jobs going in my local area were – you guessed it – in a jewellery shop. Nothing could possibly have tested my resolve more comprehensively than three little words: “please enquire within”.

Fast forward twelve years or so. After a brief dry patch of about a decade I’m now with my second ever girlfriend. I guess at this stage you could say things are getting a bit serious, as I’m steeling myself for the ultimate jewellery shop excursion: Operation Engagement Ring.

I guess it’s been a few weeks between posts, huh? Longer than I normally like to go, especially when there’s been so much going on that an overly smug serial issue mocker like myself should be swinging at harder than Chris Gayle at rank long hop. Or possibly a cute reporter.

Early last week I cancelled the only job interview offer I’ve received since my sudden and unexpected re-entry into the unemployment sector. To understand, you’re going to need some background. Once you’ve got the background, it still might not make sense. But if reading things that make sense is a high priority for you, my friend you are on the wrong website.

I go by many names. The more informed call me Garry with 2 Rs. The less informed call me Jessica. I’m from Darwin. I’m a qualified stunt linguist. I’m a Christian, a musician, a comedian and a writer. I allegedly studied linguistics and journalism at the University of Queensland in Brisbane and lived there for four years at St. John's College. I can speak some Indonesian, some very dodgy Spanish and a smattering of Nggahi Mbojo. I really like spaghetti.

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